The filmmakers of Ritual Nation explore ritual in our lives not just related to rainbow gatherings, but I think shows the importance of rituals in our lives and specifically at the gathering. Shot in the 1990s, it's a beautiful introduction and statement about why people gather in many different ways. Especially relevant to the big rituals, which happen at the gathering, like the prayer for world peace.
Saturday, June 6, 2015
Peace and the Planet (Part 5 of 5 of "Creating Peace")
When people are hungry or thirsty, violence can easily erupt over food and water. Not just in Dafur but everywhere including the gathering. How then do we show with our actions that we are actively working to protect Gaia from climatic changes that threaten world (and local) peace?
Reduce the number of campfires. Burning carbon increases global warming. Plus if you see the cloud of wood smoke in main meadow at a gathering, you'll realize that reducing the number of campfires will improve the health of every gathering participant. Click here to learn more about the negative impacts of campfires on human and planetary health.
Reduce/reuse/recycle - adopt a zero waste lifestyle. Only buy products that you will consume or that will last you for a long time. For example, buy rice in bulk with reusable containers instead of throw away plastic packaging. Buy reusable forks and knives for a gathering not single use plastics. Packaging and throw away junk contributes to climate change. The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency estimates that by cutting the amount of waste we generate back to 1990 levels, we could reduce greenhouse gas emissions by 11.6 million metric tons of carbon equivalent (MTCE), the basic unit of measure for greenhouse gases. To learn more about how what you buy creates climate change, click here.
Plus the less stuff you bring to a gathering, the less stuff YOU need to haul out when you leave. You would be amazed at the amount of camping gear that gets left behind at a gathering. Re-use that tent or find a loving home for it if you do not want it anymore. Don't leave it behind for the cleanup crew. YOU are the clean up crew. The less we buy and bring to the gathering, the less clean up we have to do. Buy food in bulk, bring gear to keep you warm and dry and forgot about the rest. Recycling of aluminum cans takes energy which contributes to climate change. Use reusable stainless steel containers for your beverages and stop giving your money to the multi-national conglomerates like Pepsi and Coca Cola who don't care about the seventh generation and are wrecking your health and the health of the planet.
Put your money where your mouth is. Walk your talk. We can change this world by spending our money in ways that create the change we want to see in this world. Shop at your local co-ops. Buy locally grown produce. We can make a difference, one person, one family, one clan at a time. Let us follow the wisdom of our Lakota siblings and heal this beautiful planet that gives us so much.
We are the people we have been waiting for to create a future for the next generation. How are you going to step up and create the change for which Gaia is praying?
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| Together we can change our future |
Friday, June 5, 2015
First time gatherer?
Everyone with a belly button is welcome to attend. However, if you have no belly button due to some medical procedure, you fall into the special group of people who have lost their belly buttons and are welcome to attend under the belly button challenged clause of the Rainbow Family guidelines. :)
That being said, showing up at a gathering and not knowing anyone can be very overwhelming. If you tell me which part of the country you live in (like southeast Ohio for example), I can try to hook you up with folks in your area - but that doesn't always work.
My best advise is to plan you arrival for early in the morning (say before 10 AM). This may mean you stay at a campground or a motel a short drive away from the gathering. Get up at 7 a.m. and do the last 75 miles. These are always the slowest hardest miles into a gathering site, some times it is easy to get lost, roads can be rough, folks are exhausted and tempers can flare. You don't want your first gathering experience to be a bad one do you?
If you 't already have plans to meet up with friends at a specific camp, gather your gear and ask people to point you to that camp. Otherwise, ask for INFO. The journey from your car to INFO may take hours. Bring one gallon of water per person for the hike in, more if you can carry it. Sometimes it's a long hike in, sometimes there a lot of traffic on the trail, sometimes you need to explore the sights along the way. Sometimes you get sidetracked by a drum circle or hug pile. Filtered water will be available at the gathering but you don't want to have to fill up for at least 8-10 hours after you arrive and one gallon of water goes fast at the gathering.
Once you reach INFO, there will be a map showing the gathering layout and some of the many camps. Some camps are location based such as NERF (New England Rainbow Family), others are activity based such as Yoga Camp. If you're not sure what's right for you, ask the folks at INFO questions about the vibe of the different camps. Again this may take hours and you want to set up your tent before dark. AGAIN I REPEAT. You will be happier if you get your space set up before dark unless wandering around all night long without a flashlight and a jacket is what makes you happy, then go for it. I also recommend walking around the gathering and feeling out what feels like a good place for YOU. Once you feel that, introduce yourself to who ever is around and say you'd love to plug into this camp. Then take it from there. Always keep your day pack with you. Keep your flashlight, bowl and eating utensils, a water bottle with drinking water, as well as a sweater or such in your backpack on your back every time you leave your tent. You may think you'll be back in 5 minutes, but you may not make it back until after dark.
Keep in mind that your first day at your first gathering is going to be a long one. No matter what, do not get separated from your gear unless the person who has it is someone personally known to you. If someone offers to help carry it, stay with them. If you don't, you and your gear may take a few days to reconnect. If you shuttle in, DO NOT put your gear on a different shuttle than you are going on. Hiking in is confusing and that kind sibling who offered to carry your tent may have thought you were going to Yoga Camp when you said Yoga Space - and yes sometimes there are multiple camps with very similar names. Again it make take a few days for your and your gear to connect up again. If you brought it, keep it with you and take it home when you leave.
Remember, dinner circle is in main meadow - Listen for the conch shell being blown later afternoon. Bring your bowl and a spoon so you have something to eat with.
If you need help with anything, go to INFO and we'll help you out as best we can.
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| Info Crew (Montana 2013) Providing Free Rainbow Shrugs (you'll get the joke after you been home for a few days) |
What is Peace? (Part 4 of 5 of "Creating Peace")
A common point of discussion when working towards peace is defining what peace is and isn't, what it looks like, which activities are considered "peaceful" and which are not.
I think at the extreme ends of the spectrum, most people can agree on what peace is and isn't. For example, most people would consider dropping bombs on other people to be the opposite of peace. Most people would consider the silent prayer/meditation for world peace and the om to be examples of peace.
That's the easy stuff. In fact trying to define peace can cause even the most peaceful among us to be less than peaceful. So what do we do if we say we want peace, but we can't even agree on what peace looks like, feels like, acts like or talks like?
I'll throw out a couple of high level ideas, but even these are subject to much discussion. I hope you continue these discussions in the circles in which you find yourself. If all goes as planned, I will be doing a few workshops at the gathering on "What is Peace and How do We Create Peace?" -- hopefully I won't be the only one.
In Creating Peace, Parts 1 to 3, we looked at some of the foundational aspects of peace (click on the topic "Creating Peace" under Gathering Topics on the right hand side of this blog).
First graders have a very good concept of peace (image from Miss Krug's Our Grade One blog):
Some people view peace as the absence of war or violence. Perhaps this view comes to us from Ancient Greece in the goddess Eirene the goddess of peace, who also celebrates decisive battles that end wars. If we subscribe to this paradigm, we probably are following the axiom "the ends justify the means."
Another high level view of peace is one that focuses on harmony and tranquility that can take the form of an inner state or a state between people. We can say she is always tranquil and peaceful or they have a harmonious marriage.
Peace can be considered as cooperation between people in a social group or culture to maintain a certain level of social order. Keep in mind that slavery existed in the USA during times of peace and for me, slavery does not equal peace.
The Global Peace Index (GPI) attempts to identify countries by their level of peacefulness focusing on various formal military measures, prisoners per capita, refugees, wars, etc.
In the last hundred years, peace has been tightly coupled with the idea of non-violence. So now we have to define what non-violence is and how non-violence methods contribute towards creating peace. Now I'm sure most of you are familiar with the teaching of the Dalai Lama, Mahatma Gandhi, and Martin Luther King Jr. -- all of which emphasis non-violence --another problematic concepts. Defining non-violence is just as hard as defining peace (but I think by now you know how to approach this issue.)
The Dalai Lama offers these words, "Peace can only last where human rights are respected, where the people are fed, and where individuals and nations are free." Of course now we have to figure out what "free" really means. For example, do we include the freedom to harm others in free? Or are your freedoms curtailed when they impact my freedoms? How does your pollution impact my freedom?
Peace is often negotiated between groups of people. For example, a family, school, city or state negotiate what they see as peace.
International Alerts writes, "
I think at the extreme ends of the spectrum, most people can agree on what peace is and isn't. For example, most people would consider dropping bombs on other people to be the opposite of peace. Most people would consider the silent prayer/meditation for world peace and the om to be examples of peace.
That's the easy stuff. In fact trying to define peace can cause even the most peaceful among us to be less than peaceful. So what do we do if we say we want peace, but we can't even agree on what peace looks like, feels like, acts like or talks like?
I'll throw out a couple of high level ideas, but even these are subject to much discussion. I hope you continue these discussions in the circles in which you find yourself. If all goes as planned, I will be doing a few workshops at the gathering on "What is Peace and How do We Create Peace?" -- hopefully I won't be the only one.
In Creating Peace, Parts 1 to 3, we looked at some of the foundational aspects of peace (click on the topic "Creating Peace" under Gathering Topics on the right hand side of this blog).
What is Peace?
First graders have a very good concept of peace (image from Miss Krug's Our Grade One blog):
Some people view peace as the absence of war or violence. Perhaps this view comes to us from Ancient Greece in the goddess Eirene the goddess of peace, who also celebrates decisive battles that end wars. If we subscribe to this paradigm, we probably are following the axiom "the ends justify the means."
Another high level view of peace is one that focuses on harmony and tranquility that can take the form of an inner state or a state between people. We can say she is always tranquil and peaceful or they have a harmonious marriage.
Peace can be considered as cooperation between people in a social group or culture to maintain a certain level of social order. Keep in mind that slavery existed in the USA during times of peace and for me, slavery does not equal peace.
 |
| Liberian Women for Peace |
The Global Peace Index (GPI) attempts to identify countries by their level of peacefulness focusing on various formal military measures, prisoners per capita, refugees, wars, etc.
In the last hundred years, peace has been tightly coupled with the idea of non-violence. So now we have to define what non-violence is and how non-violence methods contribute towards creating peace. Now I'm sure most of you are familiar with the teaching of the Dalai Lama, Mahatma Gandhi, and Martin Luther King Jr. -- all of which emphasis non-violence --another problematic concepts. Defining non-violence is just as hard as defining peace (but I think by now you know how to approach this issue.)
The Dalai Lama offers these words, "Peace can only last where human rights are respected, where the people are fed, and where individuals and nations are free." Of course now we have to figure out what "free" really means. For example, do we include the freedom to harm others in free? Or are your freedoms curtailed when they impact my freedoms? How does your pollution impact my freedom?
Peace is often negotiated between groups of people. For example, a family, school, city or state negotiate what they see as peace.
 |
Thursday, June 4, 2015
Sustenance and Safety (Part 3 of 5 of "Creating Peace")
One of the foundations of creating peace is making sure people are prepared, in the right mindset, and able to do the hard work that creating peace entails. Sustenance and Safety are the building blocks of peace.
Sustenance takes care of our bodily needs. We can't think well when our blood sugar is crashing or when we are dehydrated. Adequate food and water is a must for all in order to be able to even discuss peace (stay tuned for part 4 of Creating Peace).
One of the most important actions a person can take at a gathering is making sure everyone is eating and drinking plenty of water. This year we will be in the west and that generally means higher elevation gatherings so that we can be in a place that has shade and water. At higher elevations we need to drink more water. One gallon a day of water that has been boiled for 20 minutes or filtered with a 0.2 micron or smaller filter is a must.
When people haven't eaten or are dehydrated they act out. When they are in these conditions for too long, they get sick. When you combine these issues with over-indulgences, we have a recipe for problems that can impact the entire gathering.
Prevent the problems by making sure your and your vicinity is eating and staying hydrated. Be on the look out for people who look like they aren't getting food and/or water and help them before they start breaking the peace.
Now for the tough topic: safety.
Safety is a bit harder to come by because what constitutes a feeling of safety is a very subjective and emotional feeling. To explain what I mean, we'll talk about the estuary by my house. The salt marsh and estuary have been channelized to prevent flooding and on either bank is a trail. The east side is a paved path that hooks up with bike paths to the north and south. The west side is a dirt road with trees providing shade on a warm day as shown in the image.
People in my neighborhood have very different perspectives on the estuary. Some people view it as a haven for criminals and are afraid to go down there especially after dark. Other people loving taking their kids down to watch the Great Blue Herons and Osprey trying to rustle up a meal.
Now you would think there is some logic as to who feels safe at our estuary and who is scared, but so far I haven't observed any patterns. I see people with small kids down there watching the sunset and in the early morning many seniors walk their dogs. Then I meet other people in their thirties and forties who are scared to go down without a large group of people because once upon a time someone had a bike stolen (maybe 10 or 15 years ago).
In addition to the herons and hawks at the estuary, one finds the differentially housed: people who live in tents or throw down a sleeping bag under a bush for the night. Some people are scared of people with different lifestyles then their own, others exchange pleasantries with everyone. Some people who live in non-portable houses are sacred of the differentially housed. Others make friends.
Every time I speak at a community meeting, some people go off the deep end on how dangerous the estuary is and others talk about how it's an asset to the community. I know that I can't change people's opinions about which is which. Plus trying to address how people feel is tough. Your feelings are neither right nor wrong, they just are.
Low crime rates do not make people feel safe. Community makes us feel safe.
So having said all this, how do we help everyone feel safe at the gathering?
One way we can do this is to treat others the way they would like to be treated -- not the way you would like to be treated. Try finding gentler voices. Look out for each other in peaceful ways and make sure the people in your vicinity seem comfortable. We all have different levels of tolerance, sensitivity, and fear. Honor that.
If someone looks uncomfortable, they probably are. Introduce yourself. Smile at someone you do not know. We all feel more comfortable when we are around friends. Share your gathering wisdom. Pay more attention to body language. Learn to pick up vibes from the people around you. If you sense that someone is afraid of a situation, help them to feel comfortable by either staying with them, removing both yourselves from the situation, or trying talking to the other person about their fears in a supportive way. Just because the situation is comfortable for you, doesn't mean it's comfortable for everyone.
Honor our differences and our need to be treated accordingly. Help each other on this journey.
Please pay special attention to law enforcement officers. A scared cop is a dangerous cop (remember Wyoming 2008?). Turn down the volume on negative energy by oming instead of cussing when you do not like a situation.
Think about how you would like others to act around your three year-old child and your ninety year-old grandmother and act accordingly.
Sustenance takes care of our bodily needs. We can't think well when our blood sugar is crashing or when we are dehydrated. Adequate food and water is a must for all in order to be able to even discuss peace (stay tuned for part 4 of Creating Peace).
One of the most important actions a person can take at a gathering is making sure everyone is eating and drinking plenty of water. This year we will be in the west and that generally means higher elevation gatherings so that we can be in a place that has shade and water. At higher elevations we need to drink more water. One gallon a day of water that has been boiled for 20 minutes or filtered with a 0.2 micron or smaller filter is a must.
When people haven't eaten or are dehydrated they act out. When they are in these conditions for too long, they get sick. When you combine these issues with over-indulgences, we have a recipe for problems that can impact the entire gathering.
Prevent the problems by making sure your and your vicinity is eating and staying hydrated. Be on the look out for people who look like they aren't getting food and/or water and help them before they start breaking the peace.
Now for the tough topic: safety.
Safety is a bit harder to come by because what constitutes a feeling of safety is a very subjective and emotional feeling. To explain what I mean, we'll talk about the estuary by my house. The salt marsh and estuary have been channelized to prevent flooding and on either bank is a trail. The east side is a paved path that hooks up with bike paths to the north and south. The west side is a dirt road with trees providing shade on a warm day as shown in the image.
 |
| The Estuary |
People in my neighborhood have very different perspectives on the estuary. Some people view it as a haven for criminals and are afraid to go down there especially after dark. Other people loving taking their kids down to watch the Great Blue Herons and Osprey trying to rustle up a meal.
Now you would think there is some logic as to who feels safe at our estuary and who is scared, but so far I haven't observed any patterns. I see people with small kids down there watching the sunset and in the early morning many seniors walk their dogs. Then I meet other people in their thirties and forties who are scared to go down without a large group of people because once upon a time someone had a bike stolen (maybe 10 or 15 years ago).
In addition to the herons and hawks at the estuary, one finds the differentially housed: people who live in tents or throw down a sleeping bag under a bush for the night. Some people are scared of people with different lifestyles then their own, others exchange pleasantries with everyone. Some people who live in non-portable houses are sacred of the differentially housed. Others make friends.
Every time I speak at a community meeting, some people go off the deep end on how dangerous the estuary is and others talk about how it's an asset to the community. I know that I can't change people's opinions about which is which. Plus trying to address how people feel is tough. Your feelings are neither right nor wrong, they just are.
Low crime rates do not make people feel safe. Community makes us feel safe.
So having said all this, how do we help everyone feel safe at the gathering?
One way we can do this is to treat others the way they would like to be treated -- not the way you would like to be treated. Try finding gentler voices. Look out for each other in peaceful ways and make sure the people in your vicinity seem comfortable. We all have different levels of tolerance, sensitivity, and fear. Honor that.
If someone looks uncomfortable, they probably are. Introduce yourself. Smile at someone you do not know. We all feel more comfortable when we are around friends. Share your gathering wisdom. Pay more attention to body language. Learn to pick up vibes from the people around you. If you sense that someone is afraid of a situation, help them to feel comfortable by either staying with them, removing both yourselves from the situation, or trying talking to the other person about their fears in a supportive way. Just because the situation is comfortable for you, doesn't mean it's comfortable for everyone.
Honor our differences and our need to be treated accordingly. Help each other on this journey.
Please pay special attention to law enforcement officers. A scared cop is a dangerous cop (remember Wyoming 2008?). Turn down the volume on negative energy by oming instead of cussing when you do not like a situation.
Think about how you would like others to act around your three year-old child and your ninety year-old grandmother and act accordingly.
Wednesday, June 3, 2015
Love (Part 2 of 5 of "Creating Peace")
The rainbow family is full of love. We shout "we love you" to the sky, to other gathers, to the earth upon which we gently walk. I have many friends whose children were conceived at the gathering. We shower love as best we can on people who are unhappy about our presence in their neighborhood. We love all our siblings (brothers, sisters and transgenders), even the ones we do not like all that much. We love the person who didn't pick up their dog shit, but we want to talk to them about it as well.
We even have a somewhat sarcastic phrase "loven you" to indicate our concern without being too mushy. With all these types of love floating around, how does love contribute to creating peace? Does the manner in which we love matter or does it matter more how we express our love?
In English we are limited as we have one word for love. The ancient Greeks had four separate words for love:
Spanish has many words for love:
For the romantics among us, love is what creates beautiful art, amazing music, and sleepless nights.
For the biologists among us, love is a biological function like hunger or thirst that creates attachments between people, thereby insuring their survival in a dangerous and hostile world.
For the psychologists among us, love is not only a feeling, but a series of actions.
Unconditional love is a common theme of most of the major belief systems and is one of the often unspoken foundations of participating in the phenomenon commonly called the Rainbow Gathering.
So what does all this have to do with creating a culture of peace?
Well besides being a slogan from the 1960s, using love as a way to create connections strengthens our interpersonal relationships. If we love someone with whom we disagree, we are highly motivated to find a solution that meets the needs of everyone. If we have no personal attachment to other living beings, then we can more easily ignore their perspective and we often do not care about their happiness.
Yet loving each of our siblings all the time is challenging. Some of our siblings act out, behave poorly, don't clean up after themselves, steal, fight, or are just downright mean. What then?
Then we muster our agape and our caridad and try to make that connection. We try to befriend our siblings. By finding a connection, we are creating a relationship. It may be storage it may be afición, but if we can love another person in the worst situation, then maybe we can use that relationship to work towards peace.
But to be clear, loving someone does not mean you accept all their actions.
True love is being able to love your siblings person while calling them on their bullshit (in a loving manner).
True love is being able to communicate in a loving way why specific actions are hurting you, the planet, or other living creature.
True love is a meditative practice we undertake as we deal with the frustrations, interruptions, disappointments and annoyances that fill our lives.
Let your mantra for this year's gathering be I love all my siblings and this beautiful planet we call home.
Love is the path towards peace.
We even have a somewhat sarcastic phrase "loven you" to indicate our concern without being too mushy. With all these types of love floating around, how does love contribute to creating peace? Does the manner in which we love matter or does it matter more how we express our love?
In English we are limited as we have one word for love. The ancient Greeks had four separate words for love:
- storge - kinship or familiarity
- philia - friendship
- eros - romantic and or sexual feelings
- agape - self-emptying or divine love
Spanish has many words for love:
- encantar - indicating strong like
- gustar mucho - indicating strong like
- querer - to love romantically, to want
- afición - enthusiasm
- amado - sweetheart
- amor - pure love, romantic love
- caridad - charity
For the romantics among us, love is what creates beautiful art, amazing music, and sleepless nights.
For the biologists among us, love is a biological function like hunger or thirst that creates attachments between people, thereby insuring their survival in a dangerous and hostile world.
For the psychologists among us, love is not only a feeling, but a series of actions.
Unconditional love is a common theme of most of the major belief systems and is one of the often unspoken foundations of participating in the phenomenon commonly called the Rainbow Gathering.
So what does all this have to do with creating a culture of peace?
Well besides being a slogan from the 1960s, using love as a way to create connections strengthens our interpersonal relationships. If we love someone with whom we disagree, we are highly motivated to find a solution that meets the needs of everyone. If we have no personal attachment to other living beings, then we can more easily ignore their perspective and we often do not care about their happiness.
Yet loving each of our siblings all the time is challenging. Some of our siblings act out, behave poorly, don't clean up after themselves, steal, fight, or are just downright mean. What then?
Then we muster our agape and our caridad and try to make that connection. We try to befriend our siblings. By finding a connection, we are creating a relationship. It may be storage it may be afición, but if we can love another person in the worst situation, then maybe we can use that relationship to work towards peace.
But to be clear, loving someone does not mean you accept all their actions.
True love is being able to love your siblings person while calling them on their bullshit (in a loving manner).
True love is being able to communicate in a loving way why specific actions are hurting you, the planet, or other living creature.
True love is a meditative practice we undertake as we deal with the frustrations, interruptions, disappointments and annoyances that fill our lives.
Let your mantra for this year's gathering be I love all my siblings and this beautiful planet we call home.
Love is the path towards peace.
Tuesday, June 2, 2015
Respect (Part 1 of 5 of "Creating Peace")
The gathering of the tribes is dedicated to creating peace on earth and the positive evolution of the planet. Sometimes peace seems so hard to attain, it can be helpful to focus on strategies that create opportunities for peace. Today's concept is "Respect."
From the beginning, the gathering included concepts of respect. The invite to the first gathering in 1972 started off:
We, who are brothers & sisters, children of God, families of life on earth, friends of nature & of all people, children of humankind calling ourselves Rainbow Family Tribe, humbly invite:
All races, peoples, tribes, communes, men, women, children, individuals -- out of love.
All nations & national leaders -- out of respect
All religions & religious leaders -- out of faith
If I were authoring the invite today, I would modify it to:
All races, peoples, tribes, communes, men, women, children, individuals -- out of respect and love.
So how then does respect contribute to creating peace?
Peace needs nuturing and dialog to plant its roots and grow. Peace needs food and water. If we do not respect the needs of peace and honor those needs, we are doomed to failure. So how then do we go about creating respect at our gatherings?
When we gather, we are a community with a diversity of backgrounds, religious beliefs, political affiliations, interests, hopes and dreams. Honor that diversity in each of us -- our differences are what make us capable and interesting. Our connections are what make us strong.
The following ideas are commonly shared ideas, I didn't invent them, but I find it helpful to be reminded of them.
Respect is one of the core values in our attempts to create an egliterian culture. By approaching my family with respect I am laying the roots for a relationship. By treating people the way they wish to be treated, I can connect with others. If I offer respect to another person, that person is more likely to offer respect to me and to others. People who are treated with respect, learn how to treat others with respect.
We are all part of this big, wonderful planet called earth and hence we are all connected. Rather than trying to severe these connections, let's strengthen them. In 1994 at the Wyoming annual gathering, a forest fire occurred at the edge of the gathering up on a ridge. We formed a human bucket line from the creek at the bottom of the meadow to the ridge. None of us could have individually carried enough water up that hill quickly enough to put out that fire. But standing shoulder to shoulder and passing buckets hand to hand, we connected water and fire and extinguished the flames.
Separate issues from people in a respectful manner. When someone is engaging in non-respectful behavior, respect the person enough to explain why the behavior is creating an issue that needs to be addressed.
Acknowledge the emotions behind the inappropriate behavior and ask the person if they could refrain from the behavior and share their feelings with us instead. We all do this with our children when we refrain from saying "you're bad" and instead say "you made a poor choice" or "please use your words to tell your brother why you are upset instead of hitting him." Why can't we use this same method with adults? Especially those of us who are children in the bodies of adults.
As the early gatherers (or earlies as they are more commonly known) wrote a long time ago "we are all of us children" as we are just now learning how to live with each other. Be patient. Some of us learn more quickly and some of us learn less quickly. We all started from different places so we all have different journeys ahead of us. Let's be fellow travelers on this uncharted sea.
Everyone has an opinion and their opinion is no better nor worse than my opinion or your opinion. When we create space for people to freely share their thoughts without fear or judgement, we are creating a space where we respect each other.
Listen. We show our respect to others by listening to what they have to say. We not only listen with our ears, but our hearts, our minds, our souls, and our hands. When people feel heard, they feel respected. When they feel respected, they are more likely to respect others.
Respect is an important starting point for creating peace.
From the beginning, the gathering included concepts of respect. The invite to the first gathering in 1972 started off:
We, who are brothers & sisters, children of God, families of life on earth, friends of nature & of all people, children of humankind calling ourselves Rainbow Family Tribe, humbly invite:
All races, peoples, tribes, communes, men, women, children, individuals -- out of love.
All nations & national leaders -- out of respect
All religions & religious leaders -- out of faith
If I were authoring the invite today, I would modify it to:
All races, peoples, tribes, communes, men, women, children, individuals -- out of respect and love.
So how then does respect contribute to creating peace?
Peace needs nuturing and dialog to plant its roots and grow. Peace needs food and water. If we do not respect the needs of peace and honor those needs, we are doomed to failure. So how then do we go about creating respect at our gatherings?
When we gather, we are a community with a diversity of backgrounds, religious beliefs, political affiliations, interests, hopes and dreams. Honor that diversity in each of us -- our differences are what make us capable and interesting. Our connections are what make us strong.
The following ideas are commonly shared ideas, I didn't invent them, but I find it helpful to be reminded of them.
Respect is one of the core values in our attempts to create an egliterian culture. By approaching my family with respect I am laying the roots for a relationship. By treating people the way they wish to be treated, I can connect with others. If I offer respect to another person, that person is more likely to offer respect to me and to others. People who are treated with respect, learn how to treat others with respect.
We are all part of this big, wonderful planet called earth and hence we are all connected. Rather than trying to severe these connections, let's strengthen them. In 1994 at the Wyoming annual gathering, a forest fire occurred at the edge of the gathering up on a ridge. We formed a human bucket line from the creek at the bottom of the meadow to the ridge. None of us could have individually carried enough water up that hill quickly enough to put out that fire. But standing shoulder to shoulder and passing buckets hand to hand, we connected water and fire and extinguished the flames.
Separate issues from people in a respectful manner. When someone is engaging in non-respectful behavior, respect the person enough to explain why the behavior is creating an issue that needs to be addressed.
Acknowledge the emotions behind the inappropriate behavior and ask the person if they could refrain from the behavior and share their feelings with us instead. We all do this with our children when we refrain from saying "you're bad" and instead say "you made a poor choice" or "please use your words to tell your brother why you are upset instead of hitting him." Why can't we use this same method with adults? Especially those of us who are children in the bodies of adults.
As the early gatherers (or earlies as they are more commonly known) wrote a long time ago "we are all of us children" as we are just now learning how to live with each other. Be patient. Some of us learn more quickly and some of us learn less quickly. We all started from different places so we all have different journeys ahead of us. Let's be fellow travelers on this uncharted sea.
Everyone has an opinion and their opinion is no better nor worse than my opinion or your opinion. When we create space for people to freely share their thoughts without fear or judgement, we are creating a space where we respect each other.
Listen. We show our respect to others by listening to what they have to say. We not only listen with our ears, but our hearts, our minds, our souls, and our hands. When people feel heard, they feel respected. When they feel respected, they are more likely to respect others.
Respect is an important starting point for creating peace.
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